Tradition vs. Innovative Entertainment

Every time the 4th of July hits, my Grandma throws a party. She's a woman who thrives on entertaining and feeding as many people as possible. The yearly bash usually gathers 40 people and she's always enjoying her position as host. The past few years, the numbers have lessened and she's been more tired. Even though her home hosts a terrific view of the fireworks downtown Lititz, our own back yard has a superior view of the same and is closer to the ground display. This year, we're without our boys for the holiday and though it would be more exciting and entertaining to stay home and enjoy the works from our own porch, with the baby sleeping in her own bed, we decided to drive up the road to Grandma's and go on with tradition.

It wasn't what it usually is. There was no music or noise in the back ground and we were the entertainment. Grandpa hasn't been well. So I made a capris salad and we all feasted on that and talked about normal things, though we all felt slightly awkward. Grandma hasn't had the energy she usually does to entertain and host, even us. It makes me sad to see her so tired. I thought several times tonight, a need to pipe up and tell her that she's remarkable. "Grandma" I said in my head, "You are the very reason that I kept from being naughty in my youth and from growing up sour. Your strength and energy you choose to carry as a woman astonishes and I dream of being just like you when I'm grown." But Grandpa didn't feel well, the baby got fussy and I sipped on my water instead.

Company came and we all gathered awkwardly around the table, chatted around ego-centric topics and it wasn't warm.

All 10 of the other guests joined out on the porch on chairs and watched the sky, waiting for the show to start. Then close to 10pm, much to my happy heart, my cousins all started coming and it felt like old times! We laughed, shared and talked about the latest.

What can be done to bring back the past from when we were young? To take our stories up in bottles or make them a wallpaper? We've all grown to our own paths, and the unity of our youth and innocence has run up to choices and brought us to here: a place where we don't dream of easter and Christmas to make us laugh together and wonder at secret gifts and to talk of bunnies and games. We're further apart, directed otherwise and family is moving forward. Who knows where it's going. I can only pray that Grandma can stay forever.

So here was are, closing the evening. Photos to edit, house to clean and an earache to push everything off another day. I still have my Grandma, my children and I'm going to sleep thankful today.

Good night, world.